| the last of it all... |
[Nov. 12th, 2004|04:38 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  satisfied | ] |
| [ | music |
| | bjork in my mind. | ] |
i have come to the conclusion that this journal has many awful memories that i would like to erase from my memory. therefore i will not be posting on this LJ anymore.
if you are one of the most special people that i have chosen to become a friend on my new LJ, where i will post about my new life day-to-day... then feel priveledged.
sorry to those i didn't choose but i feel a change is in order.
i've made 99% of the posts on this LJ friends only so that certain people wouldn't see my posts. although i must admit i did a lot more private entries than friends only ones.
i'm not deleting this LJ... i will keep my memories for me to look back in sometime in the future. but for now... i need a change and to start a-fresh.
so goodbye to everyone on this LJ, and a 'i will post soon' to all those whom i have chosen to be the "special ones" :)
the end. |
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| and then it all came crashing down ... |
[Oct. 26th, 2004|05:29 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | broken hearted. | ] |
| [ | music |
| | dont talk to me about music... | ] |
Ever since I was really young, I always wanted to succeed in my music. Even though I hated practising, I worked my ass off when I did.
All through primary school I knew music was my life and always would be. It was like God had shined a light down on me when I got accepted into a special interest music school, where I started my dream.
Music is my life, and always will be. For a long time I knew that it was what I was destined to do, play and teach music. Until a camera was put in my hand, then I changed my mind about my future. But that doesn't matter... All through high school I pushed myself to limits that I never knew I could go to. It was all building up to this one year. My last year of high school.
All it was was 2 pieces to shatter my dreams. Shatter my whole 10 years of playing clarinet in 7 minutes.
I've always known that I'm good at what I do, everyone tells me it everyday, and I believe in it. Not once did I ever doubt my huge talent, until this day.
It wasn't until today that all my years of hard work, passion, everything came to a halt. It feels like the love of my life has left me...
Not only have I let my clarinet teacher down, but I've really crushed myself.
None of you will understand what I'm talking about, or how much pain I am in. But nothing, nothing at all can fix it.
The end. |
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| until further notice, this LJ will be... |
[Oct. 19th, 2004|09:37 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | calm | ] |
| [ | music |
| | cranberries in my mind... | ] |
friends only.
only because i've had people read this that i dont want to see what i think about ... things. yes.
if you want to add me, feel free to as i'm sure i will add you back.
just dont be one of them.
that's all there is, there isn't anymore... </center> |
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miss_bok's journal